What Do I Do With This Anger?

I was watching How I Met Your Mother the other day and Ted, after being left at the altar by his fiance, said this: "Kids, you might think that the only thing you can do with your anger is shove it down or throw it in someone's face. But there's a third option. You can let it go."

There are many reasons we get angry. Your boss has had it in for you from day one and his actions are completely unfair. Someone you thought was your friend betrayed you. The people around you are fake, hypocritical, rude, or just plain annoying. You've been lied to. You've been rejected. Your boyfriend or girlfriend used you. That girl over there has an easy life while you consistently struggle. It's so easy to take that anger and throw it in someone's face or badmouth them or get revenge. Or maybe you just hold it inside and let it burn you up. I myself have experienced many of the things I just listed and I know how easy it is to be bitter and angry.

Why is it important to let go of anger? James 1:20 says this: "For man's anger does not bring about the righteous life God desires." We cannot please God when our heart is filled with anger for other people. So how can we begin to let it go?

In Psalm 78 it explains how the Israelites lied to God. They flattered him with their lips but they were unfaithful to him. God was angry and punished them (this was righteous anger) but verse 38-39 says this: "Yet [God] was merciful; he forgave their iniquities and did not destroy them. Time after time he restrained his anger and did not stir up his full wrath. He remembered that they were but flesh, a passing breeze that does not return." When we are not faithful to God he gets angry. And rightfully so. Yet time after time after time God remembers that we are only human and he forgives us.

Jesus himself was rejected by the friends he loved dearly. Everyone abandoned him. He was mocked, beaten, and spit on. He was hurt and no doubt he was angry. But he still willingly died for those same people that hurt him. He even prayed to God: "Forgive them, they know not what they do."

The first step in letting go of anger is realizing what God has done for us time and time again. This humbles us and makes us realize we are all imperfect humans who need grace. When I realize how much grace God has given me, I can turn around and share that grace with my fellow humans because we all make mistakes and we all need mercy.

Forgiveness doesn't mean we have to trust that person again. It doesn't mean that the person who messed up doesn't have to face consequences. It simply means that we can let go of the anger that is haunting us and keeping us from living the kind of life God desires. This is my prayer today.